The Song Remains the Same

I woke up the entire experience felt like some sort of dream. In a way it kind of was. Nearly the entire scenario of moving had been set in my mind, but hadn't been enacted physically. In essence it was a dream, a thought. Nobody went anywhere, when I woke up this morning I was in the same place I always was.

It honestly doesn't irk me as much as it did the day before. Since I still am right where I was all along only minor adjustments had to be made. No mail had to be forwarded, my phone calls still come to the same place, and I know exactly how hot my shower is. Today feels a bit more like acceptance, in stark contrast to yesterday's fantastic bouts of denial.

In reality half the summer has gone by and a lot of things have come full circle. I never did get a better job, I still bore myself stupid while working for peanuts. And I still live under the same roof. These things don't bother me as much as they used to, even if "used to" means a mere 24 hours ago, since the last two months have turned full circle something else will cycle through again.

One thing really bothers me and that's time. I know that in the areas of living arrangements and employment I've gone nowhere. Or to put it better, these elements of my life picked up speed and formed a tornado, picking me up spinning me around for several weeks and somehow remarkable plopping me back down exactly where I was standing.

Half the summer is gone, most of it was spent waiting for things that have disappeared and that I really no longer care about. I should have taken pictures and brought home souvenirs.